Monday, August 12, 2013

How Not to Write Ad Copy

A war- and strategy game about condottieri? Right in my wheelhouse.

This game about condottieri?
This is a game that plays just as well with 2 players as it does with 8. You recieve fully customizable armies ready for medieval warfare, and you also receive Sterritt Strategy’s unique terrain system. Great for any gamer who thinks chess could use more realism, Diplomacy© and Risk© lack tactical skill, or might not have the time or space for classic War Games with miniatures. This is for gamers who want a strategic platform that they can tailor to their an hour of leisure time, the rainy afternoon or their multiple weekend long campaigns.
More realistic than chess, and more tactical than Diplomacy? Have you guys ever played Diplomacy?
These 5 ½ inch hexagonal boards make map making both quick and fun;no two battles will be the same, while allowing for easy map recreation. All Hex Boards are made to fit with any rotation and by using the interior gold numbers allow players start their armies, objectives and other entities on any uniquely designed map without having opposing armies land directly on top of each other when starting your conflict.

Each edition comes with a varied selection of these boards, and over the years we plan to increase our selection of prints for the boards to further enable players to easily expand play in the many years to come.

Also all of our Hex Boards are water resistant. This is to ensure board longevity even with some of your clumsiest friends. While it won't protect from stains like grape juice or red wine, it will protect against all manner of damp conditions.
While one of my first considerations in choosing a board game is how resistant the board is to "all manner of damp conditions" - grape juice or red wine excepted, of course - I'm also interested in games in which the terrain is more varied and depicted with some greater amount of panache than shades of green hexes against a green hex background.

There may be a really great game in here somewhere, but the copy does nothing to tell me what's great about it, and if they're relying on the pictures of the rather boring modular boards and utterly pedestrian counters to sell me on it, well, sorry, that's not going to get it done.

I want to spend my money on a game about condottieri, guys. I am your target market. But you gotta up your game.

6 comments:

  1. And I'm wondering, how well does a game that is labeled on the cover "for 2-4 players" play with up to 8 players?

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  2. I'm also struggling with the point of the game. It's clearly not an historical simulation, in the vein of FoG or Command & Colors. So I don't get what benefit they think they'll derive from trying to tie it to the Condotierri. It's not like it's a popular topic demanding a board war game of its own (like Napoleonic warfare, for example).

    Uniformative copy, components I could probably pull together from spares of games I already have, and I still have no clue how the game would play...yeah...I'm lost on this one.

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    Replies
    1. The biggest selling point does seem to be that it has "Hex Boards."

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    2. And sadly, the hex boards don't look to be all that special.

      But hey, your armies won't start on top of one another, 'cause I know I've sure had that problem never.

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    3. I'm trying to think of a wargame I've ever played where that was a concern. And even my wife laughed at the idea of Diplomacy not being very tactical. *rolls eyes*

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